Survivors of Trauma: Heroes Emerging From the Darkness

Unsung Heroes

By Lisa Compton

As I trauma therapist, I have the privileged experience of working with people I consider true heroes — those who have been through painful traumatic events and find the courage to continue living a productive life.  Trauma survivors are some of the bravest people I know.  Counseling those that have experienced trauma is both rewarding and challenging for the therapist.

As I sit with client after client that has survived various types of trauma, I am in awe of the depth of our experiences as trauma counselors.  The most severely wounded and hurting are entrusted into our care.  Their painful memories and broken spirits seek out our “expertise” often as a last hope to make sense of the chaos that surrounds the human existence.

The clients that become fixated in our own minds and trigger our countertransference are the ones who have suffered the most extreme of what this earth has to offer.  Our curiosity is often peaked by their remarkably horrifying stories and our minds sent into a whirlwind of pondering, “Could this ever happen to me?”

Treatment starts with a cry within our own spirits — what do I have to offer this client that will ease the pain, and is easing the pain even possible? We rely on our past successes with wounded clients to combat the helplessness we feel as we sit passively witnessing their trauma narratives.  We are not able to help all of them. The threat of suicides lingers in the therapeutic air as the ultimate failure of treatment.

However, there are those who are heroically able to overcome the odds.  There is a hope for even the most extreme cases that the human soul can thrive after experiencing the deepest wounds.  It is based on this hope that we ask the client to rip off the scab that has provided a barrier of protection and share with us the cuts that run to their core.  An intimacy of trust develops between them and us.  Our small office with a chair and sofa transforms into sacred ground where the evil that was meant to destroy them becomes overtaken by the power of healing and survival.

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Lisa Compton is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Trauma Specialist.  She was once a student of Scott Allison’s at the University of Richmond.

We’re Now Contributors to Psychology Today

Commentary and Analysis,

Some good news – we’ve been invited to contribute our insights about heroism at Psychology Today’s online magazine.  Over 13 million people visit Psychology Today’s website each month, and we welcome you to follow them on Facebook, Twitter, and Google+.

We’ve already posted several articles about heroes at Psychology Today. The first is called, Do Heroes Make Us Smarter? In this essay, we describe how heroes are our greatest teachers. Heroes model virtue, clarify complex and paradoxical life truths, equip us with emotional intelligence, and reveal how their journey can be our journey, too.

Our second post is called, 5 Surprising Ways That Heroes Improve Our Lives. In this article, we discuss five non-obvious benefits of heroic action. Heroes elevate us emotionally; they heal our psychological ills; they build connections between people; they encourage us to transform ourselves for the better; and they call us to become heroes and help others.

Our third post at Psychology Today asks the question, Why Are There So Few Heroes? Here we explore various reasons why heroes seem to be in short supply, but we conclude with the promising note that there may be many more heroes out there than you think.

Although we’ll be contributing to Psychology Today, we’ll still be posting hero profiles and analyses regularly at this blog and at our Reel Heroes movie blog. Thanks to all of you for following our work, and please do continue to give us your valuable feedback.

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We Can All Be Heroes

Commentary and Analysis,

Superman-is-a-HeroBy Chelsea Chico

The common persona of a hero is that of the savior of a vast city. With the new millennium, however, our image of heroes has been changing. An important question that we should all be asking ourselves is this: How do we distinguish real heroes from phony ones, especially in our confusing modern times?

Heroes come in many shapes and sizes but the precise definition, image, and character of a hero should be shown through all the colors of light. We should all agree on a few defining principles of heroism: Heroes exceed what is expected of them, they make a positive impact on people’s lives, and they rise above and beyond the ordinary.

We have our daily heroes who barely get any recognition, the most prominent of which are school teachers who mold the minds and lives of young people. Heroic teachers live on small annual paychecks compared to most people who pursue non-heroic careers. Higher paying jobs may require more schooling but why do we associate bigger paychecks with heroic merit? The people in our society with the highest paychecks seem to receive the greatest recognition of their so-called “heroism” at work.

When assessing heroism, it is important to consider motives. Lawyers, police officers, and firefighters are the “protectors” of society, you might say. They fight fires and criminals — but do they do it out of the kindness of their hearts or for the money? m29440204_514x260-Rochester-HeroesIf they are motivated by money, would you put your life in their hands? The genuine heroes seek to help others; they don’t serve others to acquire material gain. True heroes are caring, compassionate individuals who want to save and improve people’s lives independent of external rewards.

Heroism is contagious. One act of heroism inspires another individual to act heroically, as well as another, creating this wonderful domino effect. A single heroic action can have ripple effects that can transform an entire community; the community then affects the city, and the city can inspire a nation and the world. Never underestimate the cumulative social impact of heroism.

Heroism in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary has several definitions:

1 : A mythological or legendary figure often of divine descent endowed with great strength or ability.

2 : An illustrious warrior.

3: A man admired for his achievements and noble qualities.

4 : One who shows great courage.

Notice that heroism is not limited by gender. Nor is it restricted by race, occupation, age, height, or weight. Anyone can be a hero, whether a mythological figure or an ordinary citizen. Adopting this broad perspective of heroism makes it clear that heroes need not have a title, a degree, or a large paycheck. Heroism only requires a willingness to selflessly serve others. And YOU can be that hero.

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Chelsea Chico is a first-generation Colombian-American studying Biology with aspirations to become a surgeon or dentist. She is 18 years old and completing her first year of post-secondary education. Some of the things she is passionate about are: electronic music, soccer, family, and standing up for what she feels is right.

Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers: Heroic Dancing Virtuosos

Artist Heroes, Celebrity Heroes,

By Scott T. Allison and George R. Goethals

One popular genre of hero stories focuses on the tale of the buddy heroes.  These are heroes who pair up, enjoy great chemistry, display friendly friction, and perform heroic acts together that they could not perform individually.  Buddy hero stories have long graced the silver screen, television, and novels.  Examples include Bonnie and Clyde, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Thelma and Louise, Starsky and Hutch, Cagney and Lacey, The Hardy Boys, Tango and Cash, and The Blues Brothers.  Buddy hero stories differ from hero-sidekick stories in that buddy heroes are equals with complementary skill sets.  With buddy heroes, there is no dominant star; each is a force, and working together they can produce magic.

In the performing arts, perhaps no pair of heroes was more dominant and more revered than the dance team of Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers.  As with many buddy heroes, Astaire and Rogers were an unlikely pair.  Astaire was balding, less than handsome, and somewhat awkward as an actor.  His dancing, however, was poetry in motion, astonishing in its rhythm and technical virtuosity.

Ginger Rogers was beautiful, seductive, and comedic.  Her dancing was a notch below that of Astaire, but her playful coquettish style and natural charisma complemented him well.  Katherine Hepburn once observed, “He gives her class and she gives him sex.”  Together, Astaire and Rogers were greater than the sum of their parts.  No other dance team could compare.

Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers appeared in ten musical films together and revolutionized the musical film genre.  They dazzled audiences with their inventive flair.  Astaire was especially singled out for his skill and creativity on the dance floor.  Famed theater producer Jerome Robbins noted that “Astaire’s dancing looks so simple, so disarming, so easy, yet the understructure, the way he sets the steps on, over or against the music, is so surprising and inventive.” His perfectionism was legendary, yet he remained humble.  “I’ve never yet got anything 100% right,” he said. “Still it’s never as bad as I think it is.”

Alastair Macaulay from the New York Times once wrote, “Dancing together, Astaire and Rogers expressed many of love’s moods: courtship and seduction, repartee and responsiveness, teasing and challenge, the surprise of newfound harmony, the happy recapture of bygone romance, the giddy exhilaration of high spirits and intense mutual accord, the sense of a perfect balance of power, the tragedy of parting and, not least, the sense of love as role playing.”

Fred Astaire himself acknowledged that Ginger Rogers was by far his best dance partner.  “After a while everyone else who danced with me looked wrong,” he said.  “Ginger was brilliantly effective. She made everything work for her. Actually she made things very fine for both of us and she deserves most of the credit for our success.”  Although Astaire was singled out more often for his dancing prowess, many people appreciated Rogers’ great talent and believed she was underrated.  Said one fan, “Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did, backwards and on high heels.”

Below is a collage of dance routines performed by the great Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers.

Chiune Sugihara: The Hero Who Didn’t Walk Away

Unsung Heroes, War Heroes

By Jesse Schultz

There is a surprisingly profound line towards the end of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.  It is uttered by Professor Dumbledore, who says “It takes great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends”. This idea is particularly true in warfare where actions by enemy troops are vilified, while actions by friends and allies are often excused or ignored. We see this phenomenon play out even today as the United States struggles with whether “enhanced interrogation” techniques are legal and ethical, and with the legitimacy of killing civilians during drone strikes.

This was a situation facing a man named Chiune Sugihara in the waning years of Imperial Japan when he bore witness to the beginning of one of the most abhorrent acts of evil ever committed.  Born in Yaotsu, Japan on January 1, 1900, Chiune Sugihara was raised in a middle-class rural family. His physician father had wished him to follow in his footsteps but Chiune purposely failed the required exams and instead majored in the English language and passed the Foreign Ministry Scholarship exam. He was soon recruited by the Japanese Foreign Ministry and sent to China.

It was in China that hints of his future acts of heroism would come to light. During this time Japan had invaded China and the mistreatment of the locals was commonplace. In protest of the way the Chinese were being treated, Chiune resigned his post as Deputy Foreign Minister in Manchuria.

In 1939 Chiune was then sent to the Japanese Consulate in Lithuania. On September 1st of that year Nazi Germany invaded Poland and the persecution of Jews began almost immediately. By 1940 Jewish refugees from Poland and from within Lithuania itself began to seek ways to flee the country. This required visas and many countries were refusing to issue them. Japan itself had stringent requirements that the refugees did not meet. Chiune inquired to his superiors three times requesting instructions, but in all cases requests to issue the visas were declined.

It might have been easier to simply walk away and do nothing but instead, in July of 1940, against orders, Sugihara started issuing visas and even directly negotiated with officials of the Soviet Union to allow the refugees to pass through Russia on their way to Japan. He continued to write visas, reportedly spending 18-20 hours a day until September 4th when the Consulate was closed. During the night prior to the closing, Chiune and his wife Yukiko spent the entire night writing visas, and Chiune was reportedly even preparing them en route to the train station where he threw them out the window of the train to waiting refugees as it left the station. In a final act of desperation he resorted to throwing blank pages with the Consulate seal and his signature, which could be filled out later.

The exact number of Jews saved by Chiune Sugihara is not known but estimates put the number around 6,000. By comparison Oskar Schildler saved around 1,100 to 1,200 lives.  Chiune’s actions seemed to have given him few accolades immediately after the war. The Japanese foreign office asked him to resign due to downsizing —  though some have suspected it might have stemmed from his activities in Lithuania. To make a living he began selling light bulbs door-to-door and later he found work in an export company.

Finally in 1968 he was located by one of his beneficiaries and later visited Israel. In 1985 he was awarded the Righteous Among the Nations award by the Israeli government. In June of the next year Chiune Sugihara passed away in Kamakura, Japan.  Today he has streets in Lithuania named after him, an asteroid (25893 Sugihara), a synagogue in Massachusetts, a memorial at his birthplace and in Lithuania, and a memorial in Little Tokyo in Los Angeles. It seems inaccurate to refer to Chiune Sugihara as an “unsung hero” due to his many honors but many more should hear his story.

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The author, Jesse Schultz, has contributed several other essays on heroism here, including Love Thy Enemy: Opposing Heroes and Night Witches: the Forgotten Aviatrixes.  Two of his previous blog posts on Merlin and The Makers of Fire will appear in our new book Heroic Leadership: An Influence Taxonomy of 100 Exceptional Individuals.

 

Becoming A Hero: What’s Holding You Back?

Commentary and Analysis, , , ,

By Scott T. Allison

The ingredients of heroism are well known to storytellers. A hero embarks on a journey of some kind that begins when he or she is cast into a dangerous, unfamiliar world. The hero is charged with accomplishing a daunting task and receives assistance from unlikely sources. There are frightening obstacles along the way and villainous characters to overcome. After many trials and much suffering, the hero prevails and then bestows a gift to society.

Often overlooked in this journey is the key to the hero’s success, namely, the hero’s acquisition of an important quality that he or she lacks. All heroes start out “incomplete” in some sense. They lack some essential inner quality that they must develop to succeed. This quality can be self-confidence, humility, courage, compassion, faith, resilience, or some fundamental truth about themselves and the world.

The question I have for you, the reader, is: What inner quality are you missing that is holding you back from becoming the hero of your own life story? Another way to put it: What attributes are you missing that you need for success?

If you’re like millions of people, you aren’t sure what you’re missing. Circumstances may not yet have revealed your missing quality. Or people have yet to enter your life who can guide you. If that’s the case, be patient. Buddhists have a saying: “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”

Who are the teachers in your life? Let’s look at two examples of how heroes in the movies have received help from others to receive their missing qualities.

The Wizard of Oz. In the classic 1939 movie, The Wizard of Oz, Dorothy is sent by a tornado to the strange Land of Oz. Her quest is to find her way home, and she receives help from three unlikely sources—a scarecrow, a tin man, and a lion. She is mentored by a friendly witch named Glinda and, later, by a mysterious wizard. Along the way she overcomes an evil witch, flying monkeys, and apple-throwing trees.

Dorothy’s missing quality is an understanding of “home”. Her new friends teach her that she has always possessed the power to get home. She discovers that home means more than just your house or apartment. It’s wherever the people you love—and who love you—are found.

Gravity. Nominated for Best Picture in 2013, Gravity stars Sandra Bullock as Dr. Ryan Stone, a scientist stranded in space after her space capsule is damaged. Dr. Stone is terrified and appears to lack the confidence and inner resources to survive her dire situation.

Veteran astronaut Matt Kowalski, played by George Clooney, is there to mentor her and instill her with confidence. Dr. Stone summons the courage and resourcefulness to cheat death and return to earth safely.

Movie heroes are not the only ones who benefit from good mentor figures. Rocker Gene Simmons credits his mother for teaching him prudence and self-control. Actor Jennifer Lawrence has thanked her father for helping her learn how to deal with adversity. Barack Obama has said that his grandmother, Madelyn Dunham, taught him the importance of sacrifice: “She’s the one who put off buying a new car or a new dress for herself so that I could have a better life.”

In every good hero story, the hero discovers that he or she is missing something and receives help from others to acquire what’s missing. Every human life is a hero-like journey, making it imperative that each one of us identifies our missing quality.

Here are four steps you can take—not necessarily in this order:

1. Make an inventory of your strengths and weaknesses as a person.

2. Develop a list of your life goals.

3. Assess what’s missing to achieve your goals. List the strengths you lack and the weaknesses that need removal.

4. Find mentor figures to help you.

Some people do Step 4 first. A good mentor can help you identify your strengths and pinpoint what qualities are needed to fulfill your goals. Good mentors should be brutally honest about what you’re missing and how to acquire the qualities you lack.

Many of us fail, and fail badly, before we are willing to seek the help of a mentor figure. Learning from our failures and getting help from mentors is a sign of healthy human development.

Identifying missing qualities and acquiring them is essential for heroes to succeed with their missions. The discovery (or recovery) of these attributes is the basis for the personal transformation that the hero undergoes during the journey. The most satisfying heroes we encounter in storytelling and in real life are heroes who experience this transformative discovery of their missing quality.

One final caveat: Beware the dark mentor. As movies such as Whiplash and Fifty Shades of Grey show us, there are false mentors out there who will send you in the wrong direction. Choose your teachers carefully.

References

Allison, S. T., & Goethals, G. R. (2011). Heroes: What they do and why we need them. New York: Oxford University Press.

Allison, S. T., & Goethals, G. R. (2013). Heroic leadership: An influence taxonomy of 100 exceptional individuals. New York: Routledge.

Campbell, J. (1949). The hero with a thousand faces. New York: New World Library.

Franco, Z. E., Blau, K., & Zimbardo, P. G. (2011). Heroism: A conceptual analysis and differentiation between heroic action and altruism. Review of General Psychology, 15, 99-113.

Goethals, G. R., & Allison, S. T. (2012). Making heroes: The construction of courage, competence, and virtue. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology. San Diego: Elsevier.

Smith, G., & Allison, S. T. (2014). Reel heroes, Volume 1. Agile Writer Press.

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