My typical color-coded weekly calendar looks different nowadays.
By Alexis Angelus
Everyone has a way of coping, of getting through their weaknesses to be successful in everyday life. For me, I deal with uncertainty in life by planning. Since I was a child, establishing a routine and plan Bs has been my steadying force. I have a backup plan, and a backup plan to the backup plan. I set two alarms to wake up, and another four in case the backup alarms don’t go off. My Sunday ritual is writing out my schedule and “to-dos” on a self-made planning sheet I’ve been using since high school, and it’s my favorite start to the week. Now, there is not much of a schedule to put on my planning sheet, and my anxiety is lacking an outlet.
I have always known what is coming for me for at least three months in advance. That was key to my planning. Now, this ability has disappeared. The fact that I will graduate without a clear plan destroys everything I know about myself. I don’t have a solution for this, a nice way to wrap it up, besides the hope that uncertainty will teach me more about myself and make me stronger than I thought I could be.