Today I watched the TEDTalk “10 Ways to have better conversation” by radio host Celeste Headlee. Headlee started her talk by giving context to her argument for why having effective conversations is more critical now than ever. Due to the immense digitalization of our modern world, people are increasingly communicative online. While the growth of online platforms is a great way to find others with similar viewpoints, the ease of posting opinions online has lead to people using these platforms to validate their previously conceived thoughts instead of listening to others. Due to this, Headlee discussed how according to research from the PEW Research Center, that people are more polarized now than at any point than in human history. I found this really interesting because at the time of this recording the U.S. was not in war and in a strong economy, proving the divisive powers in these social mediums. This is critically important as younger generations are growing up communicating more nonverbally than verbally, making them less conversationally competent than other generations.

As an experienced radio host and interviewer, Headlee discussed how beneficial and stimulating it can be to have thought-provoking conversations. Building meaningful relationships are strongly reliant on having these types of conversations, and it is far more difficult to reach these levels of conversation in nonverbal situations. Therefore, to improve our conversations and our relationships, Headlee gave advice on the different ways she approaches more meaningful conversations. In her list, the parts I took the most away from were to assume that everyone you have a conversation is more of an expert in something than you are and that conversation is more meaningful when you listen with the intent of learning instead of the intent of replying. She also discussed the psychology behind why we are more apt to talk than listen is dually pronged: talking gives a sense of control that our minds crave, and people can typically talk 225 words a minute versus can listen to nearly 500 words in a minute, so listening takes up more of our brain energy and tires us. However, listening is one of the greatest skills we can develop and is what allows us to further our relationships.

I found this talk to be really informative and relevant to the current situation the world is in. Being in quarantine has minimized the ability for humans to have these in-person conversations, and has made me grateful for the times when I could use them.