While reading “Dicks Dicks Dicks: Hardness and Flaccidity in (Virtual) Masculinity” I was automatically reminded of a speaker who came to campus a few weeks ago named Sarah Byrden. Sarah teaches about the body of sex and specializes in changing the way sex education is taught. She believes that it is problematic that most people learn about sex through pornography and therefore are not able to accurately understand what to expect. She has a whole section on masculinity and what is wrong with the way men are portrayed, both inside and outside sexual experiences. One thing she said that resonated with me was surrounding flacid penises: no one thinks they’re important but they actually are a vital part of the sexual cycle. This quote is what inspired me to connect Sarah’s video with a quote from the article.
The article also talks about flacid penises. The article asserts that the only thing anyone ever wants to do with a soft penis is make it hard again. If young people are not accurately taught about sex, they will not understand the importance of every stage that each sexual organ goes through. As a society, we place so much emphasis on sexual performance because that is what we are taught to do, specifically through porn. If there were to be a more comprehensive sexual education in place, that includes all types of people, no matter how they identify, we would all be enjoying sex a lot more. Our coyness and inability to talk about what is actually going on in the bedroom leads to bad sex. This is further seen in people of color and LGBTQ+ folks.