This weeks class forced me to think about some very uncomfortable things about myself. However, as uncomfortable as I was, it is important to think and talk about these things.
It is easy to think that I am being considerate of the culture of those around me. Lynne helped me realize there are still some areas I need to be careful of. She was telling about an incident she had with a student who was being disrespectful and she told him he needed to address her with, “Yes, ma’am.”
I did exactly the same thing with a student that day. I have a group of students that I work with who are very difficult every single session. One of those students is an African-American boy, one student is an Asian girl, and two students are white girls. The boy and one of the white girls were being very rude and disrespectful after we had a whole conversation of expectations that day. I ended the session early and was telling them why I had done so when I was interrupted by these two students. I said, “Excuse me. That’s yes, ma’am to you.” That’s how I would speak to my children and it just came out of my mouth in a moment of frustration.
I did not feel good after that exchange, but it was because I had to be firm with my students. Again. But I didn’t think my words were inappropriate. After class I reflected on how I can handle that situation differently next time and instead I will model how I expect students to respond. It will be with a clear yes or no, but ma’am will not be attached to it.
Despite how careful I am, I’m sure there will be many other situations that I think I am handling correctly that I’m not. However, all of these situations will allow me to reflect and grow.
Chandley, Wow! How interesting that your situation was so similar to mine! You and I were raised that being respectful of our elders means saying “yes ma’am” and “no ma’am.” However, not all are raised that way. There are other ways to show respect for elders that do not require those words…Trust me…you will learn as you go and that is OK! We teachers are human and should allow ourselves a growth mindset like we provide for our students. I think if we approach every day with an open mind to the possibilities of our day and try not to judge others too harshly that is a good start. We will never be perfect… I appreciate your reflection.