Week 4:

I didn’t get to talk with Kalia today, but she cried when I popped in to wish her a happy birthday. It was yesterday; she’s sixteen now. I wish I would’ve asked to hug her, but I was scared that the staff would say no. I wish I had brought her treats.

I couldn’t hear the name of the guy I talked to today, but he was so much like me. He played basketball and football and was good at both sports. He won a championship in football and lost a championship in basketball, then came back and won it the next year. He said some losses were lessons, which stood out to me. “When you lose, you learn and you fight not to lose again.” He mentioned offhand that I must be wondering how he got here if he played all the sports and he just said he made some bad decisions. He was so smart, but I could tell he was emotionally intelligent too, and he had a big heart. His favorite meal is pork chops with rice and his mom made it for him once after a bad day. He is such a family person, and he really loves her and cares about her. He instantly picked out that family meant a lot to both of us, so I think he is a good quick judge of people. He was soft-spoken but he kept the conversation going. He was a good person. I’m so sure of that. And he’s had his losses but he’s learning from them with an athlete’s determination, but also an athlete’s patience (endurance?). He loves love songs, and his favorite is one of his mom’s favorites, by Nelly and Kelly something (I couldn’t find it). His dad raised him on the classics: Biggie, Tupac, and Keyshia Cole, but also SZA, Youngboy, and others. He loves a beat, he loves the soft words. but he also loves music for a mood. He sang in elementary school because his choir teacher was encouraging and made him want to do it, but in middle school, he only wanted to do sports. Nobody encouraged him to sing, plus other people believed it wasn’t cool, or respectable, or socially acceptable. So he stopped. I don’t know if he regrets that decision, but I think he said that he wishes he hadn’t made his decision based on what other people thought. I asked him what this place needs and he said to listen to my heart and whatever we think is best, if we really think about it, will be good. He said they will be grateful for anything and everything we give them. But now I want to do something worthy of him, and I’m not sure that we’ll be able to.