Why Being Gay Falls Outside the Manbox

Being gay is considered outside the Manbox because such an instrument reflects the stereotypes of what it means to be a man and does not necessarily reflect the realities of manhood. In the in class activity, we filled the Manbox with words and phrases such as strong, successful with women, confident, able to produce and protect many children, and non attention seeking. Homosexuality does not contradict the tenets of manhood in reality, but it does make it much more difficulty to comply with some of the stereotypes defined within the box. More specifically, homosexuality as a practice contradicts the stereotypes of success with women and the ability of a man to protect his offspring. Obviously being gay does not preclude an individual from adopting a child or donating sperm to a surrogate, but it does not allow the production of children through natural birth. As well, success with women is not the highest priority for a gay man.

It is also worth addressing the stereotype of non-attention seeking in the reference to the Manbox. Both gay and straight individuals alike often engage in attention seeking activities; however, the stereotype of the strong silent, heterosexual male has evolved over time and is displayed again and again in the media. I do not suggest the violation of this stereotype to mean that all homosexuals possess attention seeking personalities. I am instead suggesting that the nature of the male and male or female and female relationship draws attention simply because it is considered different than the norm. People tend to fixate on that which is strange to them. As such, homosexuality falls outside what many define as the Manbox simply because such an arrangement is often unexpected and thus, draws large amounts of attention. The stereotypical man does not seek and actively avoids such undue attention.