{"id":4010,"date":"2015-06-02T23:49:30","date_gmt":"2015-06-03T03:49:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/?p=4010"},"modified":"2015-06-04T15:53:35","modified_gmt":"2015-06-04T19:53:35","slug":"leverage-your-fortune-respecting-someone-costs-nothing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/2015\/06\/02\/leverage-your-fortune-respecting-someone-costs-nothing\/","title":{"rendered":"Leverage Your Fortune: Respecting Someone Costs Nothing"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"3611908731_95e2dd639a_z\"<\/a>By Steve Hutchins<\/strong><\/p>\n

Once upon a time, I was a young man. And I had some vanity. Don’t we all . . . .<\/p>\n

I had every hair color and style under the rainbow. I knew I was a faggot, even then, and I was trying to craft myself into an image that I was attracted to. So stupid. But I was a kid.<\/p>\n

One day, I followed my favorite hair stylist into Quincy, Massachusetts. That was cool for me; my comic book shop was in Quincy. I could get my hair done, get my monthly \u201cstash\u201d. It all worked. I boarded the bus and made my way. Those were the days. I was wearing my favorite long coat. It was like a trench coat, but made of wool. I wore that coat for years. Wore it out, in fact.<\/p>\n

I ended up beside a man who was, I guess, what would be called “troubled”. I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve met people like this before: it\u2019s clear something isn\u2019t quite right, but it\u2019s difficult to define exactly what. He started talking to me. Just talking. My Mum would kill me, but me, I\u2019ve always had a good handle on whether I’m in danger or not. At sixteen, yes, she would have killed me.<\/p>\n

He said to me: “You must be a businessman.”<\/p>\n

I said, \u201cWhat? Me? No!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I saw that coat and I thought you must be a businessman.\u201d<\/p>\n

I replied, \u201cNot me. It’s a nice coat, but I’m just a kid.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"american-horror-story-season-3-kathy-bates-ryan-murphy-jessica-lange\"<\/a>As impressed as he may have been with my coat, that wasn\u2019t really his agenda. He wanted to talk. And he just kept talking. And I kept listening.<\/p>\n

He was fixated on his childhood. He mentioned he was spending time in an institution in Quincy. Yes, a psychological institution. He spoke much about marijuana. Even then, it didn’t mean a thing. Ryan Murphy provided my latest clich\u00e9\u2019 in American Horror Story: Asylum<\/em>: “I don’t judge, Jude. I never judge.”<\/p>\n

At one point in this man’s conversation, I happened to look across the bus at the other passengers. They were looking at me the same way they were looking at him<\/em>. Time delivers some perspective. I was a child. These adults judged me, words unspoken, upon my casual association. It was, as if, well, you must be crazy, too, to be talking to him. I never forgot that feeling nor how unfair that was.<\/p>\n

Was I that guy’s hero? And will I ever know? It was a time and a place in space and a circumstance and a mood and. . . well, clearly no one else on that bus was willing to talk to that man. Why not? It costs you. . . what? Respecting someone costs nothing.<\/p>\n

I’m not sure why I\u2019m telling this story. It was one of few defining moments in my life, but I haven’t told it in a very long time. I suppose my point is that I had been picked on, as every kid has, but that was kid stuff and I’ve always handled bullies well.<\/p>\n

But, when those passengers on that bus looked at me, I realized that poor man was looked down upon like that every day of his life<\/em>. It wasn’t a moment for him. It wasn\u2019t a cute little story he could tell years later. He was harmless. All he wanted was an ear to bend, that’s all.<\/p>\n

I suppose my point isn\u2019t that my ears easily bend, but, rather, why is what I did such a difficult thing for most people? Who is the hero here? That stupid kid, sparing scant minutes of his life to listen, or that troubled guy fighting every day to live a better life? I never forgot that moment. It’s been thirty years now.<\/p>\n

We have to try to help others where we can. Life wouldn’t make much sense otherwise.<\/p>\n

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – –<\/p>\n

Steve Hutchins supports heroism in all its forms and resides in Whitman, Massachusetts.
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By Steve Hutchins Once upon a time, I was a young man. And I had some vanity. Don’t we all . . . . I had every hair color and style under the rainbow. I knew I was a faggot, even then, and I was trying to craft myself into an image that I was … Continue reading Leverage Your Fortune: Respecting Someone Costs Nothing<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1182,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5444],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4010","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-commentary-and-analysis"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/phawtM-12G","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4010","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1182"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4010"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4010\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4010"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4010"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.richmond.edu\/heroes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4010"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}